Do we really each have a soul mate? I mean If you date somebody and break up with them and that was your soul mate is that it? Does that mean you'll never find that one person you are meant to be with till your old wearing depends and pissing off your kids who now have to take care of you. I do know I believe marriage is forever. Even though we now live in a world were somebody could cheat on you via text, twitter, email, facebook, fling.com, and any other social networking sites around. As humans we can open our hearts to loving anyone, wether they are right, wrong, what we need or don't need.
What defines a great marriage? A great huge dream wedding with people you hardly ever talk to and puts you in debt before you even start you new life. A simple wedding with no body but you and your partner there? Doesn't matter what kind of a wedding you had or didn't have. As long as you go in knowing that this is the person your gonna wake up to everyday with hair all fucked up, make up all un done and grouchy on somedays for the rest of your life. Everyday you have to remind your self for better or worse. It's 65% agreeing and 35% disagreeing. Remember the D word is nasty, don't ever toss that out at each other in times of anger.
I've been living this married life for a little over 3 years. It's not perfect because nothing in this world is perfect but it is pretty awesome. I had pre marriage rules set up before I ever met my husband. First of all no marrying somebody you considered a best friend. I tell my best friend when I'm on my period and other very girly things that men know nothing about. Things that could gross out a guy you want to be intimate with. My second biggest was no guys with kids because I didn't want baby mama drama. Of course look at what I ended up getting into. He has two kids with his x and now their custody has been set up finally. When I met him he was still in the divorce process. We have had our ups and downs most of the downs have always had something to do with his past. But we keep moving forward remembering that we are married, love each other way too much, hace a hard time being apart, share a beautiful 3 year old daughter and actually do want to grow old together. Personally I'm pretty sure he will rock a hearing aid, be even more blinder then he already is, will for sure use a walker or cane. I'm hoping cane though lol. Will drive me absolutely insane because he will probably get lost a lot, fall more often then he already does and be so much more stubborn and forgetful then he already is. But that's ok because I can picture the old him in my mind. If you can't picture yourself and your partner old then you many want to search a little more. In the 2 other long term relationships I had been in I could never picture the older them.
I do believe sometimes marriage isn't for everybody. For along time I thought maybe it wasn't for me. Especially after I felt so let down by what I had been through when I was younger. I'm thankful I have my husband and that he's around to make me laugh cheer me up, drive me nuts and kiss me. I read on yahoo once that if you ever become so upset with your spouse to write their eulogy and that if it tears you up and makes you realize how much pain losing them would bring then you know you still love them. You must always remember a relationship is work, lots and lots of hard work that you both must do and keep it up because if only one works at it and the other doesn't then your wasting your time. You gotta suck up your pride sometimes when you are wrong. Of course you must compromise almost all the time and don't go to bed mad at each other. Remember none of that you sleep on the couch bullshit. If you know what ticks of your spouse don't do it. Be honest, if you spent 5 bucks admit it because the bank and receipts tell no lies. Always do your best to keep your spouse and yourself happy. Talk it out don't fight it out. Help each other always.
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