So quick to jump,

We all have our own defensiveness. Some can take more then others. Some snap 20 seconds before processing the situation. I strongly believe we get this from our parents and what we see as children. Example my mom is calm and for the most part can stay that way even when being pushed. Her instinct to defend herself kicks in slower then for most people. My father is far less of a hot head then any of his 11 siblings. I think it's because he is the oldest and had to learn to have patience for the younger ones. He's also managed to stay out of trouble compared to most of them as well. This makes my blood less snappy. Which means my asshole level isn't high. My maximum assholeness comes out when I feel I am being lied too or something is being hidden from me. I'm also a jerk if your mean. I wasn't like this when I was younger. I think after holding in so many things that would piss me off I hit my breaking point when I was about 20. I became more meaner more alert. I don't snap and do things I regret often. When I'm pissed I try to keep my regrettable actions to a minimum. I'm not the girl who will get pissed, and disown you as a family member or friend just because you piss me off once. I won't tell you to fuck off especially if I have something that will keep me in your life for years to come. My parents never exposed me to "fuck you" jump out of the car fighting or to one leaving the house when they are pissed. These are things I'm not familiar with.


The hub on the other hand was exposed to lots of "Fuck you" attitudes "I'm leaving cuz I'm pissed" and many more parental fights that sound really nasty and I believe have caused slight inner damage. My hub is quick to jump the gun and pull out his defensiveness sometimes. He can be quick to mistake "nothing much" into a massive attack. This I blame on his to combinations of hot headed blood that make up his DNA. His process on reaction is quick. Sometimes this isn't a good thing. We refer to this as his inner Rosasness. Because of all the "fuck yous and fuck offs" he wasn't taught the true meaning of it.

Fuck you= I don't ever want to see you, speak to you or have anything to do with you as long as I live...ever. Once I tell you this there is no going back.

Fuck off= Stay out of my life for as long as I live. I don't want shit like you in my life. I don't care whatever happens stay away. There is no going back from here.



Remember when we are pissed we can't spit out what's at the tip of our tongue. As humans we need to learn to control our defensiveness no matter how much it feels right to jump 20 seconds before processing the situation. Love is and will always be one of the best things we could ever have. Control your defense level and use it only when truly needed.